News Briefs and Altar-Cations August 13, 2023

What does ebay, shampoo, and vibrators have in common?  They’re all a part of this week’s News Briefs!

A grifter’s gotta grift!

The leader of a St. Petersburg church may have skipped over the ‘thou shalt not steal’ commandment as authorities arrest him for operating a multimillion-dollar theft ring that spanned several Florida counties.

Authorities say Robert Dell, the founder of The Rock Church and runs a halfway house for people recovering from drug addiction, is accused of working with four accomplices to shoplift branded products from Home Depot stores and sell the stolen items online through an eBay store called ‘Anointed Liquidators’.

The accomplices stole the majority of the merchandise and, on average, victimized stores five to six times a day and then delivered the merchandise to Pastor Dell’s house to be sold on eBay.

We’ve mentioned the One Million Moms and their tirades on anything fun or funny in the past.  Their latest target is Aveeno Kids Shampoo.

Hmm, what would get their knickers in knot?  Let’s watch…

Yep, it’s that damn rainbow tutu.

According to the Moms, this is child indoctrination, they’re pushing the gay agenda (because all the gays like clean hair, you know), and No child should be introduced to the experience of mental disorders through a commercial.”

OK… well, if they didn’t like that shampoo commercial, I wonder what they thought of the New York Times article on the Five Best Clitoral Vibrators!

I bet that shook them up!

“Shopping for sex toys can be intimidating,” according to the piece published in the Wirecutter section, which noted that the authors interviewed sex researchers, crowdsourced opinions and worked with 11 volunteers who tried 30-plus vibrator models to compile its list.

The consensus landed on the $150 Magic Wand Rechargeable

as the top choice because of its quiet motor, easy-to-clean silicone head and one-year warranty.

And if you’re wondering, the one that cost the most was the least favorite of the five.

I guess money can’t buy happiness after all.

And that’s this week’s News Briefs.

Altar-cations is our weekly report in response to those who say it’s the drag queens grooming and molesting children. Who is really putting children in danger?

Let’s take a look at

Luke Michael Bese who was convicted in May for having an inappropriate relationship with a 16 year-old.  The victim was a member of the Hope Kingsburg Church in California where Bese worked a youth leader.  The secret relationship last nearly eight months.  It appears the youth leader was sending her lingerie from Victoria’s Secret, a sex toy, and condoms.

And yes, he is married.

Still in California, this time in Ventura County,

Barry Fike was arrested last month and charged with with multiple felony counts of child abuse, including accusations that he tried to meet up with a 15-year-old girl for sex.

 Fike, a minister at Fillmore Church of Christ, pleaded not guilty to all charges during his arraignment.

Fike allegedly shared explicit photos of himself with the victim, who was actually an undercover officer.

And then there’s Shawn Gooden.

A boy scout leader, a leader in the Church of Latter Day Saints, lawyer… and someone who has pleaded guilty to four sexual assault charges involving a child less than 14 years old.

Detectives say Gooden also allegedly assaulted another victim who was between 8 and 12 years old.

Police in Virginia say these were not random victims and they were already in Gooden’s life prior to the dates of the alleged assaults.

Good thing those kids didn’t go to a drag show!

That’s this week’s Altar Cations.